See, since the last time I wrote a whole lot of stuff has happen. In the last post I got a little personal and went off the deep end. Between then & now, I have had a moment of clarity and a juicy story to tell. I gave away some details in the last post and so now I will share the rest for you to enjoy. I have been writing about my emotions and not enough about the Old New York that I know and love so much. So here we go on a short trip. It was semi early in the night and I was charged from drinking and all wound up from arguing with some one. Next thing I know its time to roll to the next spot and I am off. We get in a cab and off we go. So I find my self popp'n shit at the red light as I am sitting in the back by the window on the left. I dont quite remember what I was saying, but some dude in the car next to me happen to look over and at that moment I had been looking his way. Then I tell him WHAT! Yeah I am talking about you, so what's good?. He got out the car and came over. I told this dude, yo, you wanna fight let me get out this cab as he then said some shit that Im not sure about. After that he went back to his car and the cab went. When we got to the next red light, I am talking to my man tell him how that dude was pussy. If that dude was real with it, he would of just reached in when I seen'em and got his in and then out of no where, I got punched in the eye by this fuck'n bitch ass dude. I got hit once and then I was like what the fuck and I got out the cab. He runs off and I catch him, so now I get my shots in, a couple to his grill and then it was like time stopped. Him and I are standing there looking around and then we went are separate ways. When we got to the bar I was fucking pissed off. I realize I had lost my cell phone and all I could think about is, Dam now I gotta go to work with a black eye and I have to tell'em I lost my phone. The phone is a work phone. Fuck it, I went back to get it and my man Bobbi Li came with me. On the way there I told him what had happen. I could not find my phone so we were waiting for a cab and when it came, I opened the door to get in and some homo rolls up talking about its his cab. He then starts squeezing the door on me and I told'em YO! you fucking with the wrong motha fucka son. Then his fruity side kick starts screaming in my face and when this happens, the light go off up stairs and I just react. So I let this clown have it with a right and he had the nerve to say some other shit after that. I had finally had enough so I dropped him with the left and as I walked off, I told'em they could have the cab and we walked back. If only I would have had an angle to save me that night. To take me away. Then I came back to reality and realized shit fool there are some of us that still do things the Old New York way. Since then I have cleared my mind some what, but Im still far from ok and I am trying to do something about, I have had A moment Of clarity & it all hit at once. All the good shit I have talked about on how to handle, get by and over come was out the window. I am in charge of my life. It all starts with me and it is time I take control. I am the one that sits in the driver seat and I shall drive this hoopty of life to the dealer ship & trade it in. The best thing about life is always the next day you awake, you can start over. To you non- New Yorkers and the fu-gazee's who clame to be a real New Yorker. Straight up! In order to qualify, you need to pay due's. You dont just come here and live life like look at me, yay! With ya fruit cup style and ways. Get your time in son. Gett'n robbed and into fights is what happens here growing up. All Old New Yorkers have paid due's one way or another. Whether it be a harsh up bringing in the streets or on drugs to being robbed or shot in the streets. What Im getting at is Old New Yorkers all have a pain that they have due to this place and with that pain we push on and become great people who over come and adapt. So now you chumps come here and water shit down, You have killed New York. The bad news is a lot of us are fed up with the bull shit. Losing jobs and being evicted and all kinds of shit. We are still here and you better look out because the strong eat the week. Learn your pain and play your roll or go home. Other wise you can have a go fuck your self sandwich with a glass of shut the fuck up. Good day sir!
Saturday, March 14, 2009
A Moment Of Clarity
See, since the last time I wrote a whole lot of stuff has happen. In the last post I got a little personal and went off the deep end. Between then & now, I have had a moment of clarity and a juicy story to tell. I gave away some details in the last post and so now I will share the rest for you to enjoy. I have been writing about my emotions and not enough about the Old New York that I know and love so much. So here we go on a short trip. It was semi early in the night and I was charged from drinking and all wound up from arguing with some one. Next thing I know its time to roll to the next spot and I am off. We get in a cab and off we go. So I find my self popp'n shit at the red light as I am sitting in the back by the window on the left. I dont quite remember what I was saying, but some dude in the car next to me happen to look over and at that moment I had been looking his way. Then I tell him WHAT! Yeah I am talking about you, so what's good?. He got out the car and came over. I told this dude, yo, you wanna fight let me get out this cab as he then said some shit that Im not sure about. After that he went back to his car and the cab went. When we got to the next red light, I am talking to my man tell him how that dude was pussy. If that dude was real with it, he would of just reached in when I seen'em and got his in and then out of no where, I got punched in the eye by this fuck'n bitch ass dude. I got hit once and then I was like what the fuck and I got out the cab. He runs off and I catch him, so now I get my shots in, a couple to his grill and then it was like time stopped. Him and I are standing there looking around and then we went are separate ways. When we got to the bar I was fucking pissed off. I realize I had lost my cell phone and all I could think about is, Dam now I gotta go to work with a black eye and I have to tell'em I lost my phone. The phone is a work phone. Fuck it, I went back to get it and my man Bobbi Li came with me. On the way there I told him what had happen. I could not find my phone so we were waiting for a cab and when it came, I opened the door to get in and some homo rolls up talking about its his cab. He then starts squeezing the door on me and I told'em YO! you fucking with the wrong motha fucka son. Then his fruity side kick starts screaming in my face and when this happens, the light go off up stairs and I just react. So I let this clown have it with a right and he had the nerve to say some other shit after that. I had finally had enough so I dropped him with the left and as I walked off, I told'em they could have the cab and we walked back. If only I would have had an angle to save me that night. To take me away. Then I came back to reality and realized shit fool there are some of us that still do things the Old New York way. Since then I have cleared my mind some what, but Im still far from ok and I am trying to do something about, I have had A moment Of clarity & it all hit at once. All the good shit I have talked about on how to handle, get by and over come was out the window. I am in charge of my life. It all starts with me and it is time I take control. I am the one that sits in the driver seat and I shall drive this hoopty of life to the dealer ship & trade it in. The best thing about life is always the next day you awake, you can start over. To you non- New Yorkers and the fu-gazee's who clame to be a real New Yorker. Straight up! In order to qualify, you need to pay due's. You dont just come here and live life like look at me, yay! With ya fruit cup style and ways. Get your time in son. Gett'n robbed and into fights is what happens here growing up. All Old New Yorkers have paid due's one way or another. Whether it be a harsh up bringing in the streets or on drugs to being robbed or shot in the streets. What Im getting at is Old New Yorkers all have a pain that they have due to this place and with that pain we push on and become great people who over come and adapt. So now you chumps come here and water shit down, You have killed New York. The bad news is a lot of us are fed up with the bull shit. Losing jobs and being evicted and all kinds of shit. We are still here and you better look out because the strong eat the week. Learn your pain and play your roll or go home. Other wise you can have a go fuck your self sandwich with a glass of shut the fuck up. Good day sir!
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Love Me Or Leave Me Alone!
My world is crashing fast. Im losing a grip on the progress I have made & I really need to check my self. At least at this point, I do not feel the streets calling me nor do I want to be in them. I know deep down inside. The streets will be my death one day if I continue to go down that road. Really all I want is to be Loved, to feel wanted and to know that I make a difference in some ones life. The way things have been going in my life, I dont feel any of this and it is killing me. It really is starting to take its toll. Lately I find my self wanting to drink more and more. The crazy shit is I dont like to drink. I dont want to drink. After a long night of drinking, I awoke to a nice black eye & 2 swollen fists from putting the beats on someone last night. This is just not a good look for me. All the stuff that I talk about is just around the corner and I can see it coming like a Mack truck out of control coming at me, but I just can not seem to get out the way of that truck. This is the shit that is killing me the most. Not being able to change what I can foresee coming. It really is killing me. What I need is....... Is something to spark me. I just wish I knew what that spark is. Well the one thing that will come from all of this will be painting. have been making it a point to finish old paintings and start new ones as well. The weather will soon be warm and I plan to ride my skateboard once more. It is just too much fun to not do it and the exercise is good too. DAM! As I sit here writing this shit, my brain keeps replaying the night and it just does not seem real. I know its real because I got the eye to prove it and the swollen fist to show for it. Oh well,
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